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Title:Repairing Self-Abandonment: People Pleasing, Anxious Attachment, and Developing Self-Worth

Dr. Rick and I explore self-abandonment, which occurs when we go against our authentic wants, emotions, and boundaries in order to serve others, meet external expectations, or protect ourselves emotionally. We cover where self-abandonment comes from, the psychological function it serves, and the relationship between self-abandonment and similar concepts like anxious attachment, low self-worth, and external referencing. You’ll learn how to set healthy boundaries, stop neglecting yourself, and become more secure from the inside out. Key Topics: 0:00 Introduction 1:50 Common features of self-abandonment 12:35 Facing the fear of our authentic self being seen 16:20 Facing shame and self-criticism 21:30 Object relations, and creating a strong self 33:00 When safety feels more important than authenticity 41:10 Joining with the defense, and opening out 51:05 Relationships, openness to change, and bringing parts into awareness 56:00 Cognitive restructuring, and redefining our self-abandoning beliefs 59:30 Recap Offer from Dr. Rick: If you'd like to improve your self-worth, check out Rick's new 4-hour, live online workshop. You'll learn methods and practices that can actually change your brain and your habits, so you start nurturing your sense of worth and belonging. Our listeners can get 20% off with coupon code BeingWell20. Subscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: Spotify: Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient ( and host of the Being Well Podcast ( I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice. You can follow me here: 🎤 🌍 📸


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